Sometimes, you have to be your own hero, because the people you can't live without can live without you.

Okay2 i know the entry  kinda too long but yeaa thst'a what i wanna talk about here ....Hurmm ...
It's true la kan sometimes you gotta be your own HERO cos sometimes no one can save you except YOU -.-''
well that's the most hardest part ever =P 
But trust me it'll help you to become stronger than you could ever imagine yourself could be ;)
Sometimes when you too depending on others like if you got BF , GF , BFF , BFFS or whtsoever you could never know how to stand up on your own feet ... it's like when they gone / walks away / etc ...
You jst like LOSt ya know ... I know how it feels like to be LOST trust me i do know =)
it sucks ! But then i learnt that bein INDEPENDENT is the most important thing ever ... So yeahh 
BE YOUR OWN SUPERHERO .. no need to buy any costume LMFAO XD

TENSIONNNNN !!!!

"Sometimes i wonder why God put me all through this . I guess it will make me stronger but right now , im just FALLING APART "
I don't know what else to think right now T_T my head is in a BIG MESS ... All i want is to be at the shore and wait till the sunset ... Beach makes me calm i don't know why ... Since i was a kid i LOVEEEEEE BEACH .. 
I really2 wanna go there .. tak kisah laa pantai kt mne pun asalkan pantai ='( 
Arghhhh i feel like .... like ... Urghh i don't know =.='
I just need a DAY OFF atleast ... It would be enuf ... Haihhh Struggle to much to survive can cause you Tiredness To The MAX !

Old Memories ..*(Update blog while eating)* ^_^

Hurmmm ...
Out of the blue im checkin bck all of my old post in my blog ... From the start till now 
When i read it back i realize how much i change as a person since i don't know ... I feel like urghh i don't know either ... I jst a lot different from what i used to be .. i feel like macam bace novel plak when i read those posts ... About life ade , love ade , confusion ade .. haihh macam2 laa ade ... I accidently terbace post about my EX ...I wonder what happen to him now ???  .. Dia dh x text emma dah ... Account lama dia pun dia delete then i found out dia buat new account .. well whatever laa .. he's my past so stay past laa kan ... Now i got whole future to plan .. Haihhh tu yg malas ni bukak cite lame ni adeyyy ... Solly2 guys -____-'
Dah terbaca nk buat macam ne kan .. so cite je laa adoiyaii nye pun =P Suke laa blog i jgk ...
heheehe......
Well my bby IM me ckp he wanna change this EMO gurl to Rock&Roll gurl ^_^ im excited and i think some1 will be proud too ehehe *ade la someone ne leyh bgtaw* Wink*wink* 
Wonder what will i look like when this whole transformation COMPLETE 0_0  Errkkk nervous plak rasenyer ... XD mcm2 la aku ni -.-'
Well this 30th Oct Halloween !!!! Im planning to do bbq party at my gurlfren place at that time .. we make up as whatever we wish for then havin this awesome bbq dinner then party ^_^ how's that ?? It must be AWESOME ^_^ can't wait for that laaa adeyy ....Hurmm then Christmas pun otw dahhh -.-''
HohOhOOO ... 

Dear Diary(AlilTinyHeartAttack & BOREEEEDDDDDD)... oct 21st 2011

He texted me jst now then he called at 10.20pm ... Kinda get a lil heart attack when he texted "Hunny we need to talk.." 
He always came out with this suspense sentence that kinda torturing me by giving me a heart attack !
Urghh -______-'
But the point is he said that "I wanted you to give ur 100% on ur life not me .. I want you to succeed ..is it wrong wht im sayin ??"
I replied " what are you talkin about ?" few mins later he called and said " Don't ya understand what i texted you jst now ?" i said " why suddenly you came out with that kinda topic ?" Surprisingly his friend who told him that ********* to him that's why .... Hurm no wonder ... Haihh the truth is its not like i put you in my 100% concentration list bby ... i know that my studies is important and i know how to separate between studies and personal okay ... So no worries =P 
For me studies is studies ... personal is different story ... But i wonder WHY suddenly you came out with this topic out of the blue 0_o
Sometimes you make me thinkin :
Did he get bored with me ??
Did im bein annoying ?? 
Is he goin to find others ??
Did i did somethin that make him kinda slow down with me ??
etc .....

Okay im start to talk crap here -.-''
But yeah have you guys out there ever feel what im goin thru rite now ?? Have you ??? Is this what it feels like when you hooked up with some1 ? Sorry cos i nver been soo fuckinly in love b4 so im kinda like don't know much bout this lovey-dovey thang =P
What am i supposed to do ? Arghhhhhhhhhh !!!! 
Seriously i need somethin that will make me high ... like ... CHOCOLATE !!!!
yeahh i need chocolate ... SYG pleaseeeee post me a chocolate now ... pleaseee im craving for it :'(
Hurmm wht else i did today -.-''
Nothin jst plain bored plus im the maid for the day duhhh .. Chores chores n chores ... Mood : BLISSed with the chores ..NOT !!!
ONline-ing all day ... Blog-ing .. Twitter-ing ...
Erkkk ... Im soo totally , absotively , posilutely , perfectly INSANE here .... Dying cos boredom fucked me evrytime 0_0 somebdy please save meyhh ..... !! When the hell i can moves out from here .. Come on this is prison -.-'' i can't even invite anybdy come down here ... WTF ! haihhh .. well tht's the thing when you living with your parent .. Rules is rules .. like it or not Deal with it .. Okay2 i get it T_T
But hey where's my freedom as a teenager ?! Curfew ? Chores timetable ? Nonononononooooo .....
Big NO for that all ... ! Haihhhhh .. i need a HOLIDAY ... A real HOLIDAY with the person who loves me the most -.-'' that would be GOOD ... Beaches thts all in my head by now :'( i need to go to the beach !

He Meant So Much To Me

This is my HEART =) well it's not in a real heart condition cos it has been stabbed , torn apart , crashed down , blahh blahhhh .. but hey i still functioning and now im giving it to you owh wait you already stole it from me =D 
Please take care of it okay jaga elok2 jgn sampai berhabuk or bleed =) and don't have to worry about yours cos i'll take a good care of it  <3
I don't want a perfect person. I just want someone who treats me well & loves being with me more than anything... Well i think i've found him .. He makes me smile thru this hard times that i had every bad moments .. He jst there (typing this sambil menangis)* i don't know how to say that I LOVE YOU to you to make you believe that i do ... i really really do ... 
"This is the problem with getting attached to someone, when they leave we just feel lost.." i felt lost when you decided to be alone that time ... i felt like my heart has been snatched out then has been threw away in a fire ... you don't know how hurt it is ... (cryin) .. It's almost 4 month since we've been 1st time talkin at the basement on July ... Then we've been hooked up on 16th August 2011 at BB infront of a life band...
This is the 1st time in my life someone who actually really really care about me and my life (smilling + crying) Honestly i never really met a guy like this before ... So i think you're the 1st one ... I never stop thinkin of ya since the 1st time we met until now .. i guess you're really mean so much to me more than what i should know ... Bby i never really know what it feels like to Fall In Love but know im sure that i am :)
You're there to light my day , you're there to guide me thru i never stop thinkin of you for all the things i've done and said and for all the hurt that i caused you i hope will forgive me baby cos that wasn't what i meant to do ... Im sorry :'( I'll never gonna forget the day we met and all the things that we did . You're the best thing that have ever happen to me ...Yeah im cryin cos what im typin now is all i wanted to say right infront of your face but i jst don't know how to -.-''  Things about me yang you can noticed is when you merajuk or xde mood i will jst keep quite kan ... Why?? simple cos i don't know how to pujuk2 ... if we fight or somethin i didn't mean to stay senyap or sengaja x nk ckp it's jst that i don't know what to say well that's me ... i rather stay quite then talk cos sometimes i know words jst gonna make it worst so that im afraid if i tersalah ckp or somethin then we end up xckp langsung -.-'' I hope you'll forgive me .. i know that im not perfect plus im not pretty , im not that skinny , and im not that tall as what you like ....trust me i even hate myself too -.-'' but that's jst me ...
You know sometimes im so fuckinly afraid of losing you sebab before this org2 yg i syg walked out when they're the one who promised not too ... im terrified okay nk buat mcm mna, well you can blamed the one before XD Dulu i couple pun semua sekerat jln je .. kdg2 ade yg x sempat nk celebrate anniversary pun -.-''(actually xpernah celebrate any of my anniversary with them pun) sdeynyer ... Semuanya bajet macho2 je mcm xbleh blah je XD 
Say laa whatever you wanna say after you read this ... Gila ke ape ke but this is what i do ... org nk jiwang2 pun this is my blog kan kann kannn =P  i promise to jaga hati you xkan kotor punyer XD
I know im x perfect but i'll try to be good enough for you ... you always be apart of me no matter what sebab awk je yg berani masuk dlm hidup saye yg mcm semcm ni -.-'' ...
Awk je la lelaki yg textin dgn momma ... selame ni pun saye couple dgn org2 tu momma x taw pun sape diorg ...
You're the one who can make me smile even jst when you x buat that *face* XD
but actually u do that *muka ikan* that's why la i x tahan nk gelak tgk muka you ... nk mara pun x jd dah XD
But baby i wanted you to know that you meant so much to me and i love you more than myself ...
How can i forget this thing that has been in my head =)  *I LOVE YOU*

Too Much To Think ...

If you say that you love me, I expect you to mean it. Same thing goes with I'm sorry, I miss you & I'll never leave.♥
I admit that i do really2 LOVE him so much ... I swear that i wanna spnt the rest of my life with him cos he's the one who makes me feel different in such a different way ... He's the ony one who can make me SMILE whenever i CRIED ... I <3 the way he makes me pounding inside ...I really2 don't wanna lose him cos he's my life and i can't bare to lose him this time ... I swear i love him ... Just this one thing im askin please don't snatch him away form me like what you did previous time ... i can't handle it ..
he's special to me and he's the one for me ... I <3 U bby !!!